Is drunk texting other females while in a relationship cheating?

Little detail around this.... my boyfriend of 9 years and I have a child together and one on the way. We’ve been having a hard time getting back to a good place and it seems to only get worse instead, the more I find out.

I recently found out he’s been “casually” texting an ex. According to him, she reached out to him because he’s “easy to talk to” and she’s having issues within her marriage. This woman has caused issues within our relationship in the beginning and as far as I know, they haven’t spoken in the last 6 or so years. However, if a woman feels comfortable enough to reach out to a man to confide in after 6 years, to me something seems off as if he may have been talking to her on and off behind my back. He has a tendency to chat via Facebook messenger and then delete the chats and delete the app.

On top of that, a recent argument had revealed that he “still texts girls when he’s drunk” (per his words) and that “yea it happens. It is what it is. It’s not a big deal because in the morning, I don’t want them, I want you”. I told him it’s disrespectful and hurts my feelings, as it doesn’t make me feel wanted in the slightest and rather than understanding my point of view, he blew up on me telling me “everything I do hurts your f**king feelings. I’m never allowed to talk to anyone”..... anyone being females who he has drunk sexted in the past.. but according to him drunk sexting girls is a normal thing and I need to just get over it....

After hearing those words, I told him this wasn’t going to work. I cannot be with someone who truly believes being in a relationship and talking to other females is okay. No excuses. We unfortunately live together with no other options at the moment. But now he’s nice one minute and a complete ass the next. I’m so emotionally exhausted and overwhelmed 😔