This isn’t cry for help or anything like that I just really need to vent.

So here goes nothing.

I’m a 20 years old young woman that still lives at home w/ my mom to help her out with bills & things like that .. I have 2 cars one a luxury car & the other is a regular everyday car.

I let my mom drive the everyday car because her cars don’t work.

A couple a months ago I purchased my luxury sports car & I pay for it every month on time.

I lost my job a couple months ago when Covid happened & my position was terminated until further notice but I was fine & and still doing well.

Until at least August every thing took a turn for me. I didn’t notice but I had leeches all around me..I’m a very kind heard generous person so even though I don’t like people I’ll still lend a helping hand.

My cousin used me for a home I let her sleep in my bed, wear my wigs, clothes, shoes, & taught her how to build her credit, got her jobs, lended her money when she needed it.. but she stole from me & dipped.

Around the same time afterwards I helped a friend of mine (who wanted to be in a relationship w/ me) have a baby on me while I helped get his life together .. I bought him clothes, food, paid for everything he need so he could get a job, taught him how to build his credit as well & he didn’t have the decency to let me know he had a baby otw & that was his second child & got mad at me because I found out.

& I was still fine I saved up enough money at my old job to pay my bills for a at least two more months.. I just knew I’d be okay & I was.

Another friend hit me up asking me could I take a 3 hour ride for them & I’ve never driven that long before or even on the highway & I was a last resort so I said sure .. I didn’t want him to lose his job so I helped him out .. first time otw there I caught a flat I paid for it & didn’t even charge my friend a fee for taking him but it started to become a habit & I took that trip at least 5 or 6 times for him.

The last ride my car gave out on me ..

it was a Wednesday night when he called me & asked me to come get him because it was a family emergency I told him I couldn’t because I had work in the morning & I knew I wasn’t gonna get any sleep but he pleaded & begged because one of his family members was missing & it was true I felt bad so I went & got him but I told he’d have to drive back ...

Idk what happened but my engine light came on & my car wasn’t riding like it used to.. it wasn’t switching gears properly but come to find out it’s the transmission .. it was his because he wanted to drive my car like a race car..

Now I can’t use my car & I just started this new job so I can’t miss any days .. I have a second car but my mom my ran the brakes down & I had to get them fixed on my own & the guy put them on wrong.. I just paid my car note on my new car & right after found out it needs work done so I can’t drive it rn .. I had to take a Uber to & from my job Friday because no one could take me to work & then I tried getting my other car brakes fixed but there’s more problems w/ that & I’m literally on my last $4 till I get my first paycheck Wednesday & idek how I’m getting to work tomorrow & today I found a lump on one of breast ..as much shit as I been through, today I finally broke down..

All my back up plans failed. I can’t talk to nun of friend about this because I don’t have any.

And even though it’s this guys fault for messing my car up it’s mine as well I take full responsibility for it all .. I could’ve told him no & stayed home, I could’ve not answered his phone call, but he was a friend in need.

If you’re reading this thank you I just needed to let go of all this .. it’s been heavy on my mind.