So to catch you up. On September 27 my roommate yelled at me.

(I have PTSD from an abusive ex so I did NOT take it well)

I had broken a rule that I didnt know about. I went through the back door with a bean bag and a friend. (I dont have much furniture and she was being nice helping me out)

Later on, my roommate's gf tells him and I hear him call my name. I go downstairs to see what he wants. He yells at both me and my friend.

I keep strong for a few minutes to let her out to go home.

I make it upstairs and break into tears.

My husband wakes up from me ugly crying and I tell him what happened and I'm glad he consoled me but I wish he had gone downstairs to give our roommate at least a "dont disrespect my wife like that" talk. I check my phone after a while and see my roommate being more of an ass in messenger threatening to seal the back door up

I was so close to losing 3 years of being cut free. (Thankfully I still have it)

Skip to now,

I dont feel comfortable here. My husband understands I'm not happy and why. And is completely on board with moving out.

The issue is, our car is in the shop. And were not financially stable enough to leave.

So I'm stuck here.. and I dont feel comfortable.

I hesitate to do anything because I'm so paranoid about breaking another rule I dont know about.

I hesitate to come in through the front door, I stay in my room unless I absolutely must leave, to get food, go to the bathroom, and even then I hesitate.

I hold it in until I know hes in his room. I deal with it until they're at work.

I dont know if I'm overreacting or what..

My husband keeps telling me I need to talk to my roommate about it, but I feel like vomiting just by thinking about it.

I just want to be happy. And I cant be. I havent been able to even grieve the loss of my dog properly. My roommate enforces that we not be happy, i cant even put smiley faces anywhere he can see without him making them sad faces and telling me "we are not happy here!"

I'm losing my mind.

Am i overreacting? Should i just nut up and get over it?