Ever since the sun started setting before 6pm, I've been slowly going nuts😂

My poor, wonderful boyfriend is catching the brunt of it. I've been insanely insecure the past few weeks, but he's been understanding. He's honestly the best. Stg he deals with me better than I deal with me.

I keep having dreams though. Nasty, negative, so real feeling ones. The ones that bother me the most, are where he's messing around with his old FWB who literally lives less than 20 seconds from him. I do not believe he'd ever actually cheat on me. But I cannot get the rest of my brain on board. It gives me anxiety, makes me feel embarrassed for even thinking that from him, and it even confuses the absolute shit out of me because I really do trust him. We both want to spend the rest of our lives together, and never have once felt the level of connection before with anyone else.

It's honestly effecting how much I sleep. I'm afraid of having these dreams. I wake up heart broken, crying, and now, very angry at myself because I have no control over them. I don't know if it's just past trauma creeping it's way in, as it does when things are going really good, or what... but I'm looking for tips or your guys' own stories. (I'm already in therapy, and she's trying her best, just my subconscious is very adamant on being relentless with everything because I'm depressed and have very little confidence rn.)