For the longest time my son had a set schedule of awake at 9/9:30, nap at 3-4, and bed by 10. I know his bed time was late - but it was an improvement from his grandmother keeping up him until midnight thinking he’d sleep for his father and I when we’d get him home, only it didn’t work that way, and he’d be wired until 3 AM.

One night she was able to lay him down at 9, which my fiancé and I have always been able to do as well as our sons aunt - MIL is the ONLY one that has ever struggled with getting our son to go to bed at a decent hour - and ever since then she’s given me a hard time about his nap schedule and has made rude comments to me about my sitter “letting him nap”. I’ve told her countless times - my baby sitter isn’t making those calls - I am and she’s going to do what I pay her to do...

Well I posted about this here and a lot of ladies said I was rude to MIL about the nap thing and that I was ungrateful of her and that my son doesn’t needs naps - he’s not even 2 yet btw - he’ll be 2 in January... so it had me second guessing myself - like damn....should my son really not be getting a nap? So I was like ya know what, fine bitch - we’ll do it your way, I’ll keep him up alllllll day long so you can put him down at 8 cus apparently she went from wanting him in bed by 9 to 8 without even telling me - which isn’t all that convenient for my fiancé and I because we work second shift and don’t even get home until midnight and sometimes aren’t in bed until 2 AM and then back up at 7:30/8 AM with our son. But we sucked it up and did it for a week and first and foremost - my son refused to eat lunch or dinner. He was so tired he didn’t have an appetite. Secondly, my fucking MIL would be texting me at work complaining that my son has been really whiny and naughty and “doesn’t feel good”. No bitch - he’s TIRED! So Saturday she had to watch him for us while we worked and of course he didn’t nap so when we picked him up, he fell asleep in the car. It was 6 PM.....

So I wasn’t gonna let him sleep through the night and have my ass up before the sun comes out....so my fiancé and I decided to let him nap and of course he was up until like 1 AM. So I tried getting him to nap earlier in the day like around noon and that worked for all of 2 days because we had to turn his crib into a toddler bed and instead of napping, he’d climb out of bed and run around his room so I gave up. And I told my sitter fuck my MIL - give him a nap at 3 like before.

And then I got this text yesterday

So I set my alarm for fucking 7:30 AM, woke him up, so hopefully he’d be tired by 10:30ish so I could put him down for a really really really early nap, let him sleep until 12 so I could sleep too since I have to work 2PM-midnight, with the assumption that surely he’d be tired by 9 at the LATEST & apparently he was still awake until 11 PM tonight. Idk how that’s possible - idk what she’s doing or not doing that’s not working for her cus I can let my son nap 3:30-5 and still put him down at 9 and he’ll sleep....

But anyway I’m at a super loss of what tf to do cus I want to be respectful of my MIL who watches our son for free and gets up early in the morning for work but I also don’t want to be torturing my son and forcing him to stay awake all day and inconveniencing everyone else - him, my fiancé and I, my other sitter, for the sake of one fucking person. I want my son to nap. Bottom line. But I don’t want him going to bed at 11 PM. I have a second baby on the way and I wanna get this figured out before then.

So do I make him stay awake all day?

Do I keep waking up at 7:30 and letting him nap at 10:30-12 and maybe he’ll eventually get on a schedule where he’s going to bed earlier?

Do I say fuck my MIL and just go back to the schedule he was already on?

Halp! Please. For the LOVE of God. Someone help me 😩🙄