i’m in an unhealthy place and i don’t know how to get out of it

TW: body image issues, weight loss

i am a 16 year old girl, i’m 5 foot 5, and 140 lbs. i’ve been obsessing over looking “skinnier” for a long time now. i don’t even care about my weight or health anymore, just how i look. but ironically, i have no motivation to exercise or eat healthier. i don’t have much control over the food in my house, and my family doesn’t eat healthy very often. i don’t have a job so i have no money to buy my own food. most of my friends seem to be able to eat whatever they want and never gain weight because they have much higher metabolisms or they’re athletes (but of course, i have no idea if they’re going through something mentally that is similar to my situation), and this discourages me and makes me feel like i’m not trying hard enough or i’m just too fat to lose weight. and my friends and family tell me i should exercise or eat healthier when i say i feel unhealthy, but when i try to do either of those things, they make fun of me for it. i don’t think there are any healthy ways to lose weight without exercise or eating only healthy foods. i know this is the result of society getting in my head, and i know i should love my body no matter what i look like, but i can’t get in that mindset. lately i’ve been eating less, sometimes one meal a day, but some days, like today, i find myself really hungry, and before i know it, i’ve eaten way too much food (mainly sugary and processed things, and a lot of carbs). i’m trying to eat a lot less but it’s getting harder. whenever i look in the mirror, im convinced i’m fat. i’m really frustrated with myself because i want results without putting in the work, and i know that’s stupid. i’m really discouraged right now, and i’m not sure where to go from here.