Currently crying in the bathroom... I’ve dealt with anxiety since my freshman year in high school (going on 7 years) I was doing really good managing it when I was pregnant with our 2nd baby. But since having him I’ve been struggling... he just turned 2 months and I feel so unhappy and alone... I hate the way I feel... I literally snap at everyone and everything, I feel so alone, I can’t take even a 10 minute shower in peace, and I just feel like I’m drowning... I broke down about a week ago and told my husband how I am feeling... he seemed to be considerate and that day he let me go out by myself for a walk. Then it was like back to the old ways the rest of this week... he says he’s “trying” but literally he thinks doing the dishes before HE leaves to go hunting is helpful... I don’t want to be alone... All I do everyday is nurse my son and TRY to take care of our toddler which is pretty much impossible... I don’t feel like anything other than a mom... I just am so angry at my husband... he isn’t even working right now (laid off for the winter) but yet he leaves to go hunting at least 4 days out of the week and he’s gone for 5-8 hours each of those days... I’m lucky to shower alone once every 3 days... and I’m rushing the whole time because our son is crying. My husband says he can’t get our son to calm down and always is comparing him to how our daughter was. “Our daughter NEVER cried like this” “our daughter always loved the swing” “our daughter never needed to be held 24/7” I’m so sick of him comparing our son to our daughter... they are 2 different kids he is his own person and yes he is a lot fussier than our daughter was but figure it the f*** out I have to... I’ve just been crying literally all the time and my kids don’t deserve this... I have so much to be happy for and I love my babies so much... I just don’t know what to do... my husband wants me to get on Zoloft again but I hate how it makes me feel... I tried to explain to him that it makes me feel weird and that a pill doesn’t just solve “everything” but it’s like he doesn’t hear me out... I set up an appointment for counseling but it’s a televisit and I couldn’t get in until the end of january... I just am so tired of feeling like this and I don’t know why... idk what wrong with me... I never felt this sad and angry and upset when I had my daughter... idk if it’s ppd idk what it is... If your still reading this is there any advice... is anyone else struggling... I just feel so alone...