Why do I hate sex? 😭

Question

We've been together for 3 years. Sex is so horrible, I started hating sex to an extreme level. He was never into foreplay, oral, fingers, toys, kissing etc. Only blowjobs and dry sex. I hate dry sex. He won't change so I stopped having sex. No orgasms anyway so what is the point of it. After having sex with him my vagina was in so much pain. I couldn't pee, I couldn't wipe - without pain. I now hate sex so so so much. I started getting yeast infections because I'm under so much stress. I hate having sex with him he is so fucking selfish in bed it's making me sick. I get sick when I think about sex.
I know the problem is with him. Once I leave I know I'll find a guy who'll take the time to please me. But I don't see myself leaving because of sex.
I hate having sex with him. Please tell me how to cope.
It's not that I'm asexual - I absolutely loved having sex with my ex.

Answer

You shouldn’t have to cope and you wouldn’t be leaving because of sex. This is a much bigger issue which is that he is inconsiderate and doesn’t care about your pleasure or your feelings. He’s ruining sex for you and making you hate something that you used to love. Unacceptable.

Answer

Honestly sex is a big deal and if someone is purposefully damaging your body during sex because they are too selfish to do something like making sure you are ready then what do you plan to do.

Answer

I’d leave that relationship JUST because the sex is so bad and he’s unwilling. Life is too short to have lame ass sex with someone who doesn’t wanna please you.

Answer

My ex was the same exact way. I would literally cringe when he wanted sex. I never wanted it. I hated having sex with him. But I did it to “make him happy”. I was also with him for a little over 3 years. If your boyfriend is like my ex, it’s not going to get better no matter how much you talk to him. I even asked my ex why he didn’t try to get me off too. His exact words were “because you take too long”. I rolled over and went to sleep. I don’t know how I’m suppose to get off in less than 5 minutes (literally) with no effort. I left him for other reasons but I’m glad it’s over. If there weren’t other issues in the relationship, I probably would’ve left because he’s so selfish in bed.

Answer

This is a huge deal and you should leave.. he isn’t taking care of you. He’s hurting you. He’s not satisfying you. You’re allowed to leave that’s what’s dating is for. To figure out if he’s right for you

Answer

If he's that self centered I'd leave, i know sex isn't everything but a partner is supposed to think about your needs too not just his. My husband and i have been together for almost 9 years and he never stops sex till ive come atleast 2x its nit that difficult , a vibrator and a little lube is all it takes sometimes

Answer

Don’t think of it as you’re leaving “because of sex”. This issue goes deeper than just sex for him to be that way. You’re selling yourself short and guilting yourself into staying.

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￼Why would you stay with someone like this? You hate sex because you have a very selfish partner who does not care about your sexual needs ￼and is only worried about fulfilling his own. He’s truly disgusting. If you￼ don’t see yourself leaving because of this, then I hope you see yourself miserable forever because that’s what you’ll be.

Answer

I would leave.. that man is selfish.. good for u for not having sex.
U don't need him.

Answer

Only make the compromise of a bad sex life if you really are willing to do it and leave it behind you. 
But leaving because you aren’t sexually compatible is a completely valid reason to leave. You do not want to stay and start resenting your partner. 
I’d suggest y’all go to couples/sex therapy.

Why do I hate sex? 😭

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