You are never prepared for loss

I came to the hospital because I had a high fever and bday chills, we thought it was COVID. I came to get tested, and I started cramping really bad. They found an infection in my uterus. I had to deliver my baby girl just shy of 20 weeks. We are distraught and heartbroken. My beautiful baby, she was the perfect combination of my husband and I. How can we ever get past this hurt and pain of holding her little lifeless body, and not being able to protect her. How will I ever be the same again.