So I met a guy right before Covid hit last year, and things really hit off with us. We were talking through long distance for the past year and grew closer to each other. At some point he confessed and told me he loves me, and I feel the same way. Despite that, we never really discussed the terms of our relationship- meaning if we were actually together or not. Come to find out earlier today, he told me that at some point he was still speaking to other people, and he wasn’t sure if he really wanted a monogamous relationship. Hearing all of that was like a punch in the gut. This is the first time I’ve been involved with someone on a level like this; I’ve been so vulnerable with him, he knew about everything that I’ve been through, and who I am today. I told my family about him, and I told him about my experience with past romance(it’s not the best, considering there isn’t much at all-most ended with me being ghosted). I feel so stupid, and just so defeated with it. Part of me just feels like things never would’ve gone this way had Covid never existed- shit, maybe he would’ve ghosted me too if Covid wasn’t a thing. It just feels like I was something to make the time fly by. It feels like I’ll most likely be his second choice. I just wanna cry. I want things to work, I really do; but I refuse to be the second choice.