This has definitely been one weird week. Last Friday (2/12) I was using the bathroom, and when I wiped, there was blood. I was super confused because I was like 7 days PO. I was on FT with my best friend telling her about it, and she noticed the acne on my jawline, and told me I needed to take a pregnancy test. I thought she was crazy. I hadn’t even missed my period yet.

I woke up the next morning at 7:30, ran downstairs, grabbed a cup, and proceeded to take the thing. I’m sitting there, looking at the ceiling, saying “Okay God, I don’t know what is going on, but just please be with me. No matter how this turns out.” I look down, and boom. 2 lines. Pregnant. I’m in complete shock. I had a miscarriage about 4 years ago (I was 17. The dr said “Aren’t you kind of relieved?” And before you ask, I never went back there again. Found a new dr). I truly thought I was infertile with all the times I haven’t been pregnant when I thought I would be.

I called my doctor and they took my blood on Monday. I go back in the morning so they can re-check my levels, and hopefully they’ve doubled. I’m so scared they won’t and I’m so scared I’m going to miscarry again. I know I shouldn’t worry and I should just calm down, but I cannot! Easier said than done, for sure. I guess I’m posting this because I don’t know how to calm myself down. I was crying so hard earlier, I felt like I was going to hyperventilate. I don’t even know why I was crying at that particular moment. Hormones, man. And my acne! Jesus Christ, my ACNE! I have oily skin normally, but for the past few days it’s been so dry and broken out.

Thoughts, prayers, recommendations, good vibes... anything, I’d appreciate.