Sad Girl Venting:

I have been seeing this guy for eight months. We see each other at least once a week, but as of the last couple months, it’s been increased to two or three times a week. We usually spend our time at each other’s homes— either I’m having dinner at his house, or he is at mine. He’s never taken me out before.

Fast forward to Valentine’s Day weekend, things get heated in the moment, and we had very unprotected sex for the first time. (We have both been tested and also are each other’s only sex partner, but we have always, always used condoms. I took a Plan B afterwards and I am more than capable of taking care of a child— I am an adult.) After that, I decided to bring up our relationship status and asked his intentions. A lot of feelings came over me during our intimate moment— I’m in love with him and he’s never really spoke about his feelings, so I just needed a little clarity. He basically beat around the bush, though.

To summarize my morning text to him, I said that I wasn’t okay with lingering in the gray area and I need to know if he sees us becoming more than friends with benefits or not.

He responds with “I don’t want to commit myself to anything because I’m still finding myself and my views on relationships are changing. I don’t want to lie to you or set you up to be cheated on in the long run.”

We have been up under each other since June of last year. We talk on the phone for hours, we text daily, we sing and dance in our living rooms, we share several meals together, our sex life is very active, and he casually calls me “his girl” in random moments.

His actions don’t align with his words at all. He’s been in my face for 8 months acting like he wanted something from me and it hurts. I was literally falling in love with this man just for him to sweep it all from under me. I guess I can’t be upset with him for being honest.

Has this happened to you before? Feels like I’ve wasted my time.