i posted this about a month ago, i am doing so much better. his dad came into his life and left again once i wouldn’t agree to have sex w him. he blamed me and said i was a bad mom and i wasn’t woman enough to be a mom. i just got really down after finally coming out of the depressive state i was in immediately postpartum

him calling me a bad mom really just brought me right back into it. and my son was going through a growth spurt so it was miserable.

but now as my son is getting his own little personality and he wakes up everyday with a smile and he’s so happy only cries when he’s hungry but that’s usually only at night when he’s cranky and wanting to sleep.

like everyday i see that beautiful smile and hear that laugh, i know i’m doing an amazing job. my son is so attached to me and i feel it. he senses i’m happier and he’s happier too.

i have talked to my mom about my thoughts when i started feeling better bc i didn’t wanna ever go back and am going to do my first virtual therapy appointment tomorrow.

i still do have nights where i think of harming myself, but not my baby and i definitely could not imagine life without him. i know i’m going to give him the world one day 🤞🏽

edit: thank you all for your kind words i really appreciate it 🤍 it makes me feel secure in myself.