Usually when my depression hits, I almost don’t have a humanity. It feels like a whole different person has taken over and each time it feels different. My impulsive thoughts, always those suicidal tendencies just eating in the back of my mind, the not being able to express how I feel because all my life I was never once asked about my feelings. It’s like a never ending cycle of getting better for months then all of a sudden you can feel the tension changes, then you’re back to square one. You tell someone these things and they’ll lock you away, run the millions of tests on you, and give you a diagnosis you already speculated you had. Being someone with multiple mental health issues is not easy and because it’s “all in my head” makes it worse. No one wants to talk about their dark places because once you do, they gain a whole different perceptive of you. I’m hoping someday it will be different and I won’t have to worry if one day I won’t be strong enough to fight my inner demons.