When I was 13 I stayed up late night searching the internet because something was wrong with me. I didn’t feel normal inside, I had weird pains and aches. The adults in my life told me I was overreacting.

At 18 I met my boyfriend. I told him how I felt, he listened. After several birth control accidents with no pregnancy, we were sure that we were struggling with infertility. And we knew that we were the real deal, and would love an “oopsie” baby. We stopped using protection. No baby.

At 20 I was sure of what was wrong. I had coarse hair on my neck and chin, irregular periods, dark patches of skin, jawline acne, and intense sugar cravings. No baby.

At 21 I got a diagnosis. PCOS, Just like I thought. At the time I had “classic” polycystic ovaries, high testosterone, the list goes on. I was a textbook case. No baby.

At 23 my boyfriend proposed. We decided to try harder to conceive. No baby.

I’m 24 now. For the past year or so I’ve been listening to my body and supplementing. I’ve cut out dairy nearly completely, started regularly taking inositol and berberine, and being kind to myself. No fad diets and no restrictions. I don’t have any pains, my cycle is regulated, I have no bloat, my hair is manageable.

Today I got my BFP. I’m in disbelief. I am so excited and hopeful but I’m also waiting for the rug to be pulled from beneath my feet.

Does anyone have any advice for early pregnancy with PCOS? Someone send me some love please. I’m so anxious. I’m having a baby?!?!