c section scheduled but labor is near

My repeat c section is scheduled for March 9th. I’m starting to see spotting and inconsistent contractions. Anyways I’m debating whether I want to try for a vaginal delivery or not. There’s a chance of uterine rupture with VBAC but it’s very slim. Now I’m just scared of tearing and my vagina not being the same but I feel like I still need to experience it. To the mothers who have given birth before, how was the recovery? Did your vagina change a lot? Do you have bladder issues now?