Here's the facts, I'll let you decide...

She is an alcoholic.

She has chased me around my old trailer we lived in trying to hit me, (before I got married, right after my sister died) all because he step daughter planned her daughter's birthday the same day as my Bachelorette party. They were at separate times.

I used to invite her to ALL of our events, but she always would say NO. SHE WOULD EVEN LIE AND SAY SHES COMING THEN NOT COME... MY SON WAS SO HURT.

I bought her extra tickets to have her come to my sons congenital heart defect event at the zoo and she blew us off AGAIN (2019) I was soooooo upset she didn't come. This was so important to show my autistic son with heart disease support. He noticed she wasn't there because she said she was coming and bring her other step granddaughter and they didn't show.

She cried and makes herself the center of attention when I won't let her come to certain things anymore.

Her step daughter( from a marriage over 20 years ago that ended then) who is 34 and her step granddaughter who is 9 and her world. She favors them over my son. She buys them nice new Christmas and birthday gifts and she buys my son stuff from the goodwill. I grew up poor so I would not normally complain about getting a 2nd hand gift, but she spoils her step granddaughter and treats my son differently.

My mil secretly would ask my husband for money or things about me behind my back and try to get herself invited to things now.... I finally called her out on it and she made herself the victim and started crying..... made a big old scene...

I don't know how to live like this. We live in the same town, so its not like I can totally avoid her, can I?

Im worried my son will notice her behavior eventually.

What should I do about this toxic relationship? Is it because she drinks? Am I over reacting?