Hello all! Just need a space to put my thoughts and feelings where they will be understood. My husband and I are on the <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> journey with male factor infertility. Our fresh transfer in January failed which was pretty devastating to me as I was trying to be very hopeful and positive. In 2 days we go for our first frozen transfer and I'm not feeling very hopeful. I know that it's normal for a fresh transfer to fail and then go on to have success with frozen but I don't want to set myself up for the disappointment again. I have a gut feeling this transfer is going to fail again too and I am trying to protect my heart. On top of all that my sister in law and best friend just told me yesterday that she is 7 weeks pregnant. She has a 9 month old and this was their first month ttc for baby #2. She knows all of the details of what we are going through. It's so hard for me to he happy for her. I feel jealous and angry and selfishly wish she could have just waited a few more months. And having those feelings makes me feel even worse because I want so badly to be ecstatic for her.

This rollercoaster of <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> is so exhausting. If this transfer fails, I think I'm going to need to take a few months off. It is really weighing on my emotions and relationships.

If you read this all, thanks for listening and send positive vibes my way because I sure could use them.