Desperately needing advice!!!!!

I just had a baby in November 2020. Me and my husband just starting having intercourse recently but I told him absolutely DO NOT enter me without a condom because I am extremely fertile and I was ovulating at that time. We are getting handsy and he slowly starts trying to enter me. He will nudge it than be like “oh sorry my bad” or “I didn’t mean too” and he kept nudging it until it finally went in. Now, normally I would just let it go to keep the moment going and just keep going for him(I’m ashamed I’ve let this happen for so long) and just let it happen regardless of having asked him not too. But this time after he entered(it was a little more than the tip but still) I slowly got up and started to try and change positions. Than I just moved over and sat down. I got so mad. Madder than I’ve ever been. For our entire 6 year relationship I’ve let stuff like this slide in the bedroom. After I’ve already said no to something he will do it anyway, act like it’s an accident or I’ll just give in and do it cause I know he wants it. I’m mad at myself for allowing it but mad at him for disrespecting my body! I let him have it that night. Fast forward 2 weeks. I might be pregnant. I have two kids, I DO NOT WANT ANYMORE. I’m so conflicted. I have no idea what to do. I just had a baby 3 1/2 months ago!!! I am mentally and physically just not able to do it right now. I lost my sister to covid 2 weeks prior to having my baby in nov. I cant do it but I don’t want to have an abortion. I hate my husband.