Am I crazy?!

So my SO has been abusive in the past. In every kind of way. But he has always apologized and everything and always says he’s not like the rest and blah blah blah. He has even cheated on me. So why the hell can I not leave him? Like he is better now and the abuse has pretty much stopped. So why can’t I leave. Like we even got a divorce. Is there something wrong with me?