Not sure how much more I can take 😞

I posted a question last week about what rights a step-parent has. I don’t like my kids to be under the influence of my BD’s wife. I heard they got married and she must be spending even more time with my kids. My son is talking about how he wants to be a “scientist” like her and both of them are going on about some experiment they’re doing with her. It may sound harmless but it’s literally making me feel ill. They’re just kids so they don’t know the harm this woman caused us and I’m having a hard time getting past it. I’ve never gotten an apology from her for how she contributed to me and him never getting back together and essentially leaving me to raise kids alone that had been planned within a relationship. I been wanting to SNAP on this home wrecker for years. And please don’t tell me to move on. If it hasn’t happened in 6 years, i doubt it will ever happened. When I see her the hate resurfaces like it was yesterday. When I hear her name come out of my kids mouths I get heart palpitations. I feel like I’m conditioned to hate her ass.