Okay, I’m tired of feeling like this. This is killing me. I’m in a committed relationship of 5 years with the love of my life. He is the man of my dreams and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him. We are planning to settle down soon with marriage and what not and I can’t wait. But I have this female friend that I have a crush on and it’s killing me. I hate that I feel this way towards her. She says she’s 100% straight, but acts opposite. When we hang out, she always flirts with me, compliments me, stares at me. When we’re together, there’s just this thing I can’t explain. She knows I have a crush on her and I told her recently that I would love to just feel platonic towards her. I love her and don’t want to lose her as a friend neither do I want to ruin my relationship. After I talked to her about my feelings, everything was fine. I moved on, it’s like my sexual feelings towards her vanished. (We work together as well and at work, I felt nothing unlike before). Fast forward to this weekend, we went out with a group of our friends and we got drunk and the flirting and compliments, stares, and touching started and now I can’t get it off my head. But when you ask her, she acts like it meant nothing and says she loves me and thinks about me, but only as a friend/sister. She acts like she doesn’t do these things. I don’t want anything from her other than friendship. I mostly like men, but sometimes my feelings for women creep up. I just want to stop feeling this way about women and her in specific. I’m tired to reading meaning into the things she does. Maybe it’s all in my head, but my other friends say they notice what she does too.