(Ex) Husband vs New Boyfriend

I’ll try to make this quick - but I think it’s long. But let me say thank you in advance for reading it through, because I’m exhausted and need some advice. So thank you💜

Long story short. 2 years ago, my husband and I decided to split up. We continued living together, sleeping in separate rooms, he traveled for work, so we only saw each other in passing usually two days a week if that. We have a 4 year old son.

Fast forward - my ex started dating shortly after the split. No one serious, but multiple dates just to be social, etc. I however did not. We never fought for our marriage - but nothing major ever happened. We grew apart and work was his priority. Plain and simple.

We get along incredibly well. Always have. We have so much love for each other, treat each other with so much respect - that part of things I’m so proud of and thankful for.

Fast forward - I could not move on. So 9 months later - I made him look me in the eye and tell me it wasn’t going to work. Seeing him say it to my face was the only way I could fully accept it and move on. So, he did.

I let my heart break and started building myself up WITHOUT him. I had to. I wanted to continue being a great mom, I got a new job to make my own money, I didn’t want to rely on him, I just felt confident in myself.

Then 6 months after that started dating. I went out with a few guys here and there but very casual - I just wasn’t ready. Any way, a friend and I started hitting it off more and more.

So, he is long distance. Our connection is ridiculous. I trust him. We decided to give it a go. Like, all in. So I have been openly dating him the last 6 months.

I bought my own home. Everything was fantastic and I was proud of myself.

THEN MY EX HUSBAND CAME BACK. He wants me, he wants our family, he wants to give this a shot, etc.

So now - here I am. Loving two people. If it were just me, I would choose my new boyfriend. But my son is in the picture, so I feel I should choose his dad. A part of me is worried I’ll be unhappy. A part of me thinks we could come back stronger than ever.

My BF and I are long distance lovers - he wouldn’t move here until his daughter graduates. My son would have split holidays, houses, families, and yes I know that could work - 100%. Or do I choose the man I have history with. Who didn’t want to fight for it then, but is ready now? The man who if I choose him, my son gets his family together. Trips, holidays, memories, etc.

I have so many trips and events planned with boyfriend - but I have to make a decision. I can’t keep living this double life. Either I continue with what I’m doing and it sets my child up for a different, not bad, just different lifestyle, but I’m with someone who makes ME genuinely happy. Or I choose his dad and loose the person who I believe I should be with, but I have my family together. Because that’s just as important to me.

I’m sorry this is long. But I need to get out of my own head. So any words of advice would be so appreciated.