I’ve been away from my ex-husband, August will make 5 years but in that time it’s just been so hard to just love himself bc every time I look at myself all I see is the scars he left on my face that now make me more self conscience than before, before it was only trying to lose weight to back to a decent size and me being self conscience with my smile cause of my overbite (EW! 😑🤢🤮😷) now it’s like I blame myself for staying with him even when the abuse got worse but I felt I had no one to turn bc her distance me from my family and had me cut off all communication with them when I was in the relationship with him so I had NO ONE to help. I cry from time to time kicking myself about why I didn’t leave when the red flags was beating against the wind? I just keep going back to blaming myself and on I felt my family wouldn’t help me bc my mom put me just as much in bad terms with family as had herself in. I know it’s suppose to get better with time but I can’t help that I still back to beating myself up about and being told it WASN’T MY FAULT but I feel like it WAS!!! I mentioning it, I just thought after this long it wouldn’t hurt so bad but all I have is bad memories every time I look at myself in the mirror and look at my face, eye, and my ears and how I wish I could fix it or just go back to the time where my face just didn’t look like it does now.