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How can I make myself look less borning

I got with boyfriend a few months ago I see him every 3 weeks but now he’s away for 4 months and I feel like I’m borning him 😭 like all I do is look after my 3 year old who isn’t his they get on as friends but they aren’t close so all i can talk about is cleaning the house help me 😭 I really really like him

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