✨long post✨

I just need some advice on this because I’m torn. I had a home birth with A midwife. I saw my OB until 28 weeks (Until I felt comfortable enough to transfer to having a home birth) So I saw the homebirth midwife from 28 weeks until 42 weeks 😱 A little backstory... I expressed to the midwife multiple times to let me know if anything was off. She assured me she was not going to try to be a superhero and would always let me know if something was off. At 41 weeks I saw a different homebirth midwife and she listened to Babys heartbeat with a Doppler… She told me she felt something was a little off and was going to get in touch with my midwife. Obviously this concerned me a lot but my midwife assured both of us that that was ‘her normal’ And it would fix itself after birth. Fast forward to delivery at my home, everything went well until after I had the baby. She just basically told me something was off with her heart not to be too concerned but to go see the pediatrician sometime that day. So I made an appointment with my baby’s pediatrician And was seen about six hours after baby was born. Turns out my baby has a condition called heart block and was rushed to the local hospital and was soon airlifted to a more equipped hospital where she spent three weeks and now has to have a pacemaker. The midwife should’ve caught this and not said that her heart rate was ‘her normal’.. Is it fair for me to ask for a refund? Or should I just let it be because I am the one who chose to have the home birth? I just feel there are so many things she should have told me to do. She should’ve gotten me an ultrasound when she heard that the heart rate wasn’t completely good. She should’ve told me to go to the emergency room instead of the pediatrician. This should’ve been caught and the baby should have been delivered at 37 weeks. My baby also has extra complications because she stayed in so long. Please no judgment, I just want to know what you would do and what is fair