I don’t even know what I’m looking for


I’ll try to make this quick. I suffered a miscarriage on Christmas <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.eve">Eve</a> last year, I had a bad feeling the entire short pregnancy that something was wrong, I was right. Had a D&C and was fortunate enough to get pregnant rather quickly.

I’m actually due on Christmas Day. I’d like to think this isn’t coincidence and a blessing and sign that this baby is going to be healthy. Idk that I could handle another Christmas like the last one.

Well last night I had the most vivid and realistic dream that I miscarried again. I was in the hospital and passed the baby and was trying to scoop it out of the toilet all by myself. I was bawling in my dream and woke up crying in real life. I had a hard time settling down because the emotions in my dream were so real (maybe because I’ve felt the reality of that loss in the past?). I’ve just had a hard time shaking it today.

Can I just get some good vibes, prayers and support from you fellow mommas?