BF won’t tell his family that he and I are together and we’ve been dating nearly a year. We had tried dating once before for less than 3 months and things were sort of strained between us for a time but we have talked everything out and resolved it and we are legitimately happy together and better for each other now than we were when we first tried because the circumstances are different. But when his family calls or comes into town or when his siblings are gaming with him I’m not allowed to go see him I barely ever hear from him I have to sneak around in the dead of night to see him for a few minutes if he lets me. I understand being cautious for a few months but I’ve put in 1,000% effort to show him how much I care. But he still hides our relationship... I don’t even want their approval, I seriously don’t care at this point because of the horrible things they’ve said. I just want it established that just like I respect and do not challenge the importance of his family in his life, they should respect and not challenge his decisions even if they don’t like them.

Lately I’ve been wondering if we should just break up.... I don’t want to, I love him. Truly. But.... I would never ask him to choose between me or his family, they would and have. I don’t want him to be forced to make that choice but I won’t be a secret anymore.... idk... this is half of me needing to vent and another half wanting to know what someone else would do....

UPDATE

I have since ended things with the person I was with when I wrote this post, I told him that we just weren’t a good match and that’s okay. It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with him it’s just we aren’t right for each other and we both deserve happiness. I tried being as kind as I could be with as hurt as I was but he just didn’t take it well, I want the best for him but I’m happy now. I ended up going out with a friend who I realized is the true love of my life and has been the entire time I’ve known him (several years) and I needed to go through what I have to see it. We are now together and expecting a baby ☺️ I’ve never been happier