I posted this before when I was stressed out.

Now I calm down, post it again to find helpful solutions from others.

My partner and I, we both, have our own things to do (full-time work-from-home job, personal to-dos, etc.)

Pre-pregnancy, we liked to do things together. I cooked daily. He chose movie to watch. On weekend, we went hiking or play game at home. Most of the time, I was the one came up idea what to do because he had a hard time to make decision (if I let him creating a plan, I had to remind him, otherwise, we ends up doing things separately).

During pregnancy, we started to do less things together. Partially, I did not feel well with all the hormonal changes. Also, I started to feel bad like “why I am usually the one plan things for us?”. I kept telling myself that maybe I had too high expectations and I should let it go and let him having more time for himself. Gradually, we less did things together. If we tried, it did not turn out well. Because of the baby, I let the negative thought away and took a lot of self-cares.

Post-pregnancy, inevitably, we have to take care of the baby *together*. That is our responsibility no matter we do things well together or not.

It starts heating up in our family since the baby born. We are both tired and start making another disappointed (of course, we don’t mean to).

I feel really disconnected and not synchronized with him.

There are days I saw him just play game or trade stock when the baby is screaming of boredom/hungry. The baby is safe, but how his behavior could be called “parenting”.

I mean, if he has to be in a call meeting when the baby is screaming, that makes sense to me. I see that happens to my coworker and me all the time (when work from home). It is understandable.

But he plays game or watches stock when the baby is screaming, that does not make sense to me at all.

Please help correcting my thoughts (I might be completely wrong here)