Forced abortion

Me and my boyfriend had planned for a baby in the beginning of March on April 17th I found out i was pregnant. He was happy and I was too. I finally told my family about a week after a found out and no one was happy especially my mother soon after I started to become depressed. my boyfriends family was excited and started planning stuff already. For a whole two weeks straight my mother would call me all kinds of bitches , tell me how im not gonna be shit in life , how im sad and a disappointment in her life , she kicked me out , she would fight me kick me in my stomach , every time I would mention the baby she would tell me i need to get an abortion, she wouldnt let me use the insurance cars for my doctors appointment. Long story short my boyfriend ended up in jail for tickets for a total of 33 days . When my boyfriend went to jail things got 10 times worse with my mother . she set up an appointment and said im not going to have an a baby . I didnt wont to get an abortion but I went and had it at 9 weeks . I was forced , I was weak and hurt , I was mentally and physically abused . Now when I bring up the whole pregnancy to my mother she would say quit bring up that dumb shit or I dont care. When my boyfriend got out and i told him about it he said I did it willingly and stopped talking to me . is it my fault i had an abortion and our baby isn't here ?

My would be due date is coming up in 2 weeks the closer and closer i get to it I become even more depressed . I'm not sure how i will handle the actual day.