Advice ?

Question

Everybody is telling me that I “need” to put my baby’s father on child support this & that . And that I’m irresponsible for not taking it. 
But he provides for our child fine without the child support. Our baby needs diapers ? He buys them the same day. Same goes with anything else our child needs etc. we have a good relationship and so he provides the way he should be even when we aren’t on good terms and what not. My theory is.. why do I need to take his money out of HIS paycheck that he works hard for when he buys the necessary items needed when our child needs it? Makes no sense to me, but how do y’all feel about it? I dunno.. I have my own job, I pay my own bills and I don’t need his money but for some odd reason everybody looks at me sideways and confused when I tell them I don’t get child support, and they AUTOMATICALLY ASSUME the father of my child is a no good dead beat. Not to mention we both know there’s a possibility we may or may not get back together . Does anyone else agree with me or ?

Answer

I agree with you. If he is already taking care of his baby then I feel there’s no need for child support. If he decides to stop taking care of his kid then you can file at that time if that happens. Hopefully it won’t.

Answer

I can totally understand not wanting to rock a boat that doesn’t need to be rocked. Especially if you guys have an agreeable relationship and it works for you. Legal documents just can help the both of you if something stops being agreeable. It’s just an added source of protection just in case something happens that results in things not being so friendly.

Answer

If it works for you then don’t worry about what other people think.
You can always change your mind though if circumstances change in the future (if he stops providing, if you lose your job or have to stop working for any reason, etc.).
As kids get older expenses increase as well- it might not just be about buying specific “things” like clothes or diapers, you also have increased expenses for bills (water, electricity, groceries) and additional expenses like school activities, attending birthday parties, hobbies, etc. If he’s happy to pitch in for some of these things or you’re happy to pay then that’s fine- it’s not really anyone else’s business. I’d say they’re either going off their own experience or off experiences that others have had where the father hasn’t paid at all or things have turned at some point.

Answer

My mom never took my dad to court for child support for that same reason - he always contributed to anything we needed. Usually the order is for when that isn’t happening.

Answer

I think if you aren't having any problems and you are happy with everything theres no reason to put him on child support. You don't "need" to

Answer

He’s doing what he needs to , I don’t see why you would need to put him on child support that’s like him trying to put you on child support for no reason

Answer

I am 100% on your side here. You have an agreement with him and that is no one else's business but yours and his. Child support is to support the child's needs and he is already doing that so whats the point of putting him on it.

Answer

Don't put him on child support if it's not needed. I don't know who's in your ear telling you otherwise but don't do it. Sometimes women use child support to punish the father of their child(ren). If he's doing what needs to be done and your little isn't suffering, then please maintain that relationship. I know of some women who had a man doing everything they needed to do for their child even though the parents weren't together but for whatever reason the woman put the dad on child support. They stopped being the great dad they were being and only did the bare minimum as a result, probably because they felt betrayed.

Answer

I wouldn’t get involved in the courts if I didn’t have to. You do you, if it works don’t fix it. If you go after him he may want to reject helping financially at all.

Advice ?

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey