Havana Mae - Born July 1, 2021 🌈💕

So let me start out by saying, it was a very LONG labor and delivery process but it’s so worth it!

I went into the hospital at 6:30pm on Monday June 28th 2021 to be induced. I was exactly 39 weeks and 4 days pregnant here. My due date was July 1st.

Originally in the last few weeks of my pregnancy, my Dr was concerned for our baby girl’s size. At 37 weeks we had an ultrasound and she was projected at 7 lbs 1 oz already. I was checked for the first time at 36 weeks but it wasn’t until 37 wks that I was dilated to 1/2cm.

Baby girl was head-down, dropped, perfect position. We began discussing induction for 39 weeks on June 24th. Because I’m stubborn and didn’t want to have to have a C-Section but HAHA - Spoiler Alert!!

Anyhow, when we went back to the drs at 38 wks on June 17th, my dr told me that since I had not dilated any further, than 1/2cm, that it might be wise to give my body an extra few days - so instead of June 24th, we agreed to be induced on June 28th.

Haha - nice try.

I was given Cytotec that night, 06/28, got a little crampy but no big deal.

Husband and I just chilled in our hospital room awaiting our baby girl, our rainbow 🌈.

Around midnight - 1am June 29th, I was given the second Cytotec.

In the morning, I was checked and only at 1cm.

My Dr didn’t want to give me Pitocin right away. Hence why we tried the Cytotec. Then, we tried the balloon catheter — VERY UNPLEASANT.

It was in for 12 hrs and it got me to like 3cm.

Now my Dr is ordering the IV of Pitocin be started. So it was.

So through all this, my contractions started getting out of control so I needed a shot to get them to regulate into a pattern.

That worked for a bit, then they started to space out.

I was dilated to 4cm I believe on June 30th, finally. Now mind you that’s over 2 days into an induction and still no baby.

I labored for a loooooong time. They tried so many things, so many medicines to try and get me going.

My favorite IV pain med they gave me was Nubain, I was able to sleep quite well.

By around 4:30am July 1st, I had just gotten back from the bathroom and back into my hospital bed.

My husband was next to my bed on a cot bed the nurses had provided him with and pillows and blankets.

Anyhow, I settle back into bed and I feel this weird liquid-like feeling.

I said, “what was that?” My husband says, “what?” I told him I felt like there was fluid coming out of me and I asked him to check if it was blood.

He checked and said it was clear. I knew it wasn’t pee because I had just gone.

Then the nurse came in and we mentioned it, she said, “did your water break?” I said I wasn’t sure and she checked, said that It probably did.

So now we got a broken water. And after that, HOLY SHIT DID THOSE CONTRACTIONS PICK UP!!! Oh my gosh it was awful, the Nubain was no longer helping. I held out as long as I could, but by this point I want the Epidural. Thank Hod I’d signed the consent form hours ago so it was just about getting the anesthesiologist into my room to give me it.

Around 730/8am, I got the epidural. After about 10 minutes, I didn’t feel a thing. I was so exhausted but relaxed.

They then placed a catheter in me, and that stayed til 9 hrs after her birth. Hated that thing, stupid catheters.

But, I slept 90% of the day after getting the epidural.

Around 9pm that night, I was finally 9cm so we began “practice pushes”. But I threw up first lol. Because she was still a tad high.

By 10pm, I was 10cm and pushing. That’s hard work!

I pushed and pushed. Every time I’d push, baby would come down, then the second I stopped to breathe, back up she went.

She wasn’t coming down like we’d hoped. But we kept trying.

Hours ticked by, I kept pushing, trying so hard.

By 2;30am July 1st, my due date, my Dr came in the room and told me that she does not think that this is going to happen vaginally. She called for a C-Section. I cried because I didn’t want one, I wanted her naturally. I felt so disappointed in myself because I couldn’t do it. I looked at my husband, crying, and said, “I’m so sorry”. He said it was okay I tried my best and this is the best thing for you and Havana (our baby girl) now. I cried and asked my Dr., “Are you going to do it?” She nodded and said, “Mhmm”. She had me sign a consent form. It was over. I’d done all I could. It wasn’t going to happen my way. The way I’d hoped.

As soon as they began getting us ready for the OR, I was falling asleep, I heard them say “she’s exhausted”.

Anesthesia came in and gave me an amplified epidural because apparently you’re awake for a C-Section now.

I had lots of pain medicine, the epidural, the amplified epidural, IV pain medicine. You would think that stuff would knock me out. Nope.

We get into the OR and my husband is dressed like a surgeon, and he sat by my head. I was sort of crying because I told him I was so sorry, I was so sorry. He told me “it’s okay we have to do it this way, it’s going to be okay”.

I was scared, won’t lie.

Within 35-40 minutes of getting in there, I can feel my Dr tugging and pulling trying to get Havana out and I remember screaming “it hurts! It hurts!”

So I was given 2 shots in my arm for pain. That shit didn’t help.

I was crying, I was scared, I worried if Havana would be okay.

At 3:15am, though, July 1, 2021, I heard that first cry.

And I cried too. I said, “my baby....my baby!”

My husband was stroking my head and said, “yup there she is, she’s right there..”

The nurse said, “look to the left, look to the left”

And, I saw her. They were cleaning her up on the table/Warmer and I heard her crying. I cried too. I said, “ is she ok? Is she ok?”

My husband, Dr, and the on-call Pediatrician said, “She’s perfect”.

She was so beautiful, immediately I couldn’t imagine life without her. I couldn’t imagine having anything be different.

They wrapped her up and handed her to my husband who brought her by me. I remember stroking her little cheek saying, “my baby....”

Then, they left. I had to be stitched up obviously and I cried and screamed for a good portion of that. Despite all of the pain medicine, I felt it all and it hurt so bad.

After about 30 minutes, it was over and they were bringing me back to our room.

When we got back, my husband was holding Havana in the chair next to where the bed goes. He said, “guess how big she was” I was kind of groggy and I said, “huh?” He says, “9 - 3”. I was like, “what?” No wonder she wasn’t coming out vaginally.

I gave birth to a beautiful 9 lbs 3.3 oz 20 in baby girl that day, at 3:15am, exactly 40 weeks.

The Nurse said, “we’ll get you situated and then you can hold your baby”.

So, they got me situated and my husband brought her over to me. The nurse asked, “now do you just want to hold her, or do you want to do skin-to-skin?”

I said, “skin to skin” obviously. So, I unhooked my gown and they laid her on my chest and I instantly forgot about all of the pain, all of the exhaustion, all of the disappointment within myself. I just forgot. About all of it.

She is so beautiful, so perfect, so absolutely worth it. 💕🌈

It doesn’t matter now, the c-section wasn’t my plan, but it was God’s and he helped us through. We are so unbelievably blessed to have our beautiful baby girl, our rainbow 🌈 after the storm ⛈

Now, as I sit here and hold my brand new baby, I cannot help but feel so blessed. I wouldn’t have this any other way and neither would my husband. We love our girl 🎀🎀🥰🥰💚💚🌈🌈