Reposting cuz a bitch needs advice asap

(I just want to preface this with a potential trigger warning, brief mentions of ab/se and SA)

I need some advice. Me and my boyfriend are thinking about going all the way next time we go out on a date. We've gotten sexual before, but haven't had full on sex. I have a lot of sexual trauma, specifically revolving around men. Our past encounters have often ended with flashbacks after he left, but whether or not it's bad I typically feel like it was worth while as it was consensual and fun for both parties. He's aware of this, and respectful of this, and I know he'd respect my boundaries and decision regardless. I've never had consensual sex before (though, he hasn't either), and I don't know how I'm going to react mentally. I trust him a lot and I do want to explore this side of myself with him because I feel safe with him, but I'm worried that I might end up freaking myself out and ruin a relationship because I pushed myself too much. I think I want to do it, but I'm not sure if this is weighed by solely attraction or attraction and logic.

I also wanted to add in, once again, that he's very respectful. I don't really trust men because of my horrible experiences but he's an exception to that which really says something. He's not pressuring me, manipulating me, etc. He consents to it but whether or not we go through with it is up to me because consent is a two way street. Also if we do have sex it's going to be safe, I have an IUD, we have condoms, we've both been tested, and have a way to get plan b if somehow all else fails. It's really just up to me and my mental state but I don't really know what to do in this situation. I also have a lot of religious trauma as well and a lot of fears I'm still trying to get over revolving around sex, despite me no longer being religious. All of that being said I really do want to have sex with him. It's a very confusing and overwhelming situation and I'm just not really sure what to do or say. Any advice or insight on this situation?