Thoughts?

Question

My last relationship made me believe this a little. He was always saying “but at least I don’t hit you” when I would bring up how degrading he was when he would speak to me.

Accepted Answer

I wholeheartedly believe that most men are inherently abusive in some way. Even “good men” and “good fathers” I think all gaslight, manipulate, emotionally confuse, etc. It’s not their fault specifically, because I think it’s how our society raises boys to neglect their own emotional wellbeing.

Answer

Because women aren’t capable of this and much, much worse? Cmon. Women get away with physical and emotional abuse far more than men do and men put up with more of it. 
I’m not advocating for men, I’m advocating we recognize the equality that comes with abusive relationships in general. 🙃

Answer

Abusive trash comes in all forms. Maybe we just normalize functional relationships 🤷🏼‍♀️

Answer

I definitely agree and I just want to point out that abuse isn’t always men on women. I think women also tend to forget that men experience mental and emotional abuse from their partners, but that they also often brush it off because it’s not physical. And women don’t think they “can” abuse men because it’s not physical or because their physical abuse “doesn’t hurt” as much. 
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not at all excusing the behavior in men or minimizing the abuse that women go through in their relationships. I simply feel it’s important to remember that abuse is NOT one-sided and that it happens to men more often than most people tend to realize.

Answer

I think the important thing to remember is that this doesnt apply to all. It's not fair to generalize all of them as emotional abusers. I see these kind of posts and always remember how thankful I am to have my husband bc hes everything I could ever dream of as a perfectly available husband (emotionally, physically, spiritually). But an unfortunate LARGE amount of guys are like this and i only assume it stems back to the patriarchal belief that men arent "allowed" to express emotion. I see my husband cry all the time and it's easy to forget that a lot of men think of it as a sign of weakness, when it's really a sign of emotional strength.

Answer

If they know they can break the woman down to a point to make her feel worthless then in their minds they don’t need to beat her to keep her in line. They see their words have down more damage than if they were to put their hands on the woman.

Answer

Yes, but all abusers excuse their behavior, and therefore do not think they are as bad as ___ because they each have their own limit. TW I was reading stories of abusers by an abuse therapist and a man who sent his wife multiple times to the hospital told him: at least I didn’t kill her like some men would have.

Answer

I totally agree but for some reason when women "make bad decisions" while under the emotional abuser's thumb, all she gets is blame 🤔 tell me how the hell you can support the fact that emotional abuse is real, but then not support the victims when their lives are in shambles?????

Answer

amen

Answer

Nah. I have a brother and I’ve seen how capable women are of doing the exact same things to him as men have done to me. There are terrible people in both genders.

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