For the past 2 years I have been on antidepressants, Xanax, and in therapy.

Nothing helped me. I’m not trying to be negative or tell anyone to stop their antidepressants and do shrooms. But I had such a BAD reaction to EVERY antidepressant from memory loss to tremors to SEIZURES.

I couldn’t do it anymore. I don’t give a shit for Xanax either.

I have been so... y’all have no idea. Someone who’s alive and has no idea why she’s alive. Just going on and on and on, wondering what the point is.

I did psychedelics. I mean, that’s the hardest drug I’ve ever done and I still don’t think it’s that hard of a drug. I did acid once, and the rest of the time shrooms.

Basically psychedelics smacked me back to reality as hilarious as that statement seems. It was like “hey. You idiot. Quit sleeping on yourself. Life is so beautiful, so meaningful and you have so much potential. You are worth it. You’ve always been worth it, you fucking drama queen.” And it’s like the fire in me that had gone out years ago came back. And I have this will that I did not used to have. I don’t want to die anymore. I went and got a job, I went from being codependent to completely independent within 6 months when I could not even get myself out of bed before. I wouldn’t shower for days. My hair would mat to my head. I wanted to die. When I say I literally have no idea how or why I’m still here I mean it. I socialize now, I’ve made new friends. I have a LIFE now. I’m alive.

I do not do psychedelics often. I’ve done them 3 times in the last 6 months. So I’m not sitting here saying I trip balls everyday of my life.

There are legitimate peer reviewed studies about psychedelics helping depression. I suggest really looking into that before freaking out on me. Psychedelics have literally completely and absolutely changed my entire life and my entire brain. I’m definitely going to vote for it to become medically legal. Because all the Prozac in the world could not save me, but a few trips did.

Oh yes I definitely make sure I am always safe. I always make sure have a trip sitter that knows what they are doing and I’ve never had a bad trip. I also don’t over do it. I do still talk to my therapist and she’s amazed by my life improvements