Offensive or no?

Question

My boyfriend called me “skinny”. And ever since he said it I’ve been in a weird down mood and looking at ways to gain weight which was already a goal of mine. I’ve started to lose weight due to postpartum depression. It’s on and off. So when I’m down I tend to not eat as much. So I’ve lost weight and I hate it so his comment just really hurt coming from someone who’s suppose to make me feel beautiful and sexy. You think I’m overreacting?

Answer

I feel like it is an overreaction unless you've told him you don't like being called skinny. If you haven't, tell him, so he knows it bothers you. 
I've always struggled with being underweight. I dropped my pregnancy weight and was underweight in two weeks with all of my pregnancies. My husband calls me skinny all the time. It doesn't bother me. He's right even though I don't LIKE being skinny. But he'd stop calling me that if I asked him to.

Answer

Depends how he said it and how you have communicated your feelings towards it. He might have meant it as a compliment, but if you feel upset by it tell him For sure, and if you have told him before that it bothers you then he was wrong.

Answer

how did he say it though? was he like 'you are looking really skinny' as in concerned for your health? or 'you're way too skinny' as in a criticism? i'm sure he didn't say this to hurt you on purpose he probably has NO idea what you are going through and you may need to communicate with him you are struggling as it is and remarks like this don't help you. he probably has no idea you are so triggered by this comment - communicate with him so he understands - not take it out on him.

Answer

If he were to have called you fat it’d be offensive so this is too. Especially if he said it in a negative way or know you’re insecure about your weight loss

Answer

I voted no because context matters. If the word triggers you maybe tell him this. He might not have realized the weight of the word on your mental status. 
Also stressing about things usually doesn't help. Maybe talk to your MD and see a therapist/nutritionist.
My old roommate had weight issues but basically she just never felt hungry and didn't eat enough meals in a day. Her nutritionist helped her see her calorie deficit and with small changes she got to her ideal weight. Her whole mental state improved with appropriate calories too. She was always lethargic and tired but she's so much happier and full of energy now.

Answer

If it made you feel bad, then youre not overreacting. Ive told my husband the only comments he’s allowed to make about my appearance are positive ones in relationship to how pretty i am. I have close female friends who can tip me off to weight issues, but to me, its not my husband’s place because i take it too personally. For my girlfriends, i dont take if as a testament of my personal merit, just them looking out for me. (Look, it doesnt make sense, but if it made sense it wouldnt be an insecurity, would it?) 
I would suggest you enact a similar code of communication with your partner.

Answer

People think skinny is ok but fat isn't - it equates to the same thing... a judgementof you appearance - maybe not 'average/normal'. If it's a term that has made you feel sad/uncomfortable then it's offensive to you.
Tell him, he may no know that's how you feel and it's hard to be mad at someone that doesn't know that what they said upset you. If he continues then yes I would get pissed off. 
Like I said people think calling someone skinny (particularly AFTER having a baby) is almost a nice thing to say but its not if you fell you are too slim - PPD can be hard enough without worrying about your appearance too.
Slim is alot more delicate.
I'm sure once he knows he will reassure you how sexy you are!!

Answer

I think it's inappropriate for him to make comments about your body like that especially is he 1. Knows you have ppd and 2. Knows it's a goal of your to gain weight. I feel like there's nothing productive that would come from him making that comment to you, do yeah I would be upset too. Especially with the ppd I took every criticism so much harder. I'm sorry you are feeling like this but I get it :(

Answer

I’ve been skinny shamed my whole life. By other skinny women, bigger women who couldn’t control their weight, and women who weren’t concerned for their weight. All the women were beautiful in my eyes but in theirs it was wrong for my weight to have been on par with what drs wanted it to be. It is not okay ever for someone to make a comment about your weight whether it’s offensive or not. I don’t think you being upset about it is an overreaction but I definitely would mention that you don’t appreciate being talked to about your weight even if it isn’t with ill intent.

Offensive or no?

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