I give up

I give up I want this pregnancy so bad but there might not even be a baby I want it so bad but my so is treating me so badly I want this more than anything but I can’t seem to get good news I want this baby even if I have to do it alone I want everything to be ok and the doctors to tell me there’s a baby and everything is gonna be ok I wish my body could carry a baby and I didn’t have go through my second loss I wish my so would be understanding and know that im in pain and hurting I just want him to hold me but all he does is yell I wish there was something I could to that would insure a successful pregnancy and a healthy baby I would be there for them through everything I wouldn’t judge them if they’re veins were different I would hold them close every time they cried I would love them so deeply and dearly that they would know unconditional love I would do anything for this pregnancy to be ok I would love to see them I would love to hold them