I really didn’t know where to vent but i am numb. I had an ectopic back in march 2021 and while comin into terms with it because i was told it’s just bad luck. So i waited for my cycles to return and concieved right away it may. I was so shocked, happy.. nd all those pregnancy symptoms hit me back to back. I was vomiting 7-8 times a day, dehydrated yet was happy to go through any trauma for my baby. I went in for an early scan at 7 weeks and saw my baby with a HB of 150bpm. Everything was perfect.

Suddenly at around 10 week mark, my pregnancy symptoms started fading away, i was reassures by many including the dr that placenta takes over at that time and usually everything subsidises, eventhough deep down something said me it wasn’t gonna go correct and i need to b ready to go through another process of miscarriage, i stl went on bein optimistic because i was 13 weeks nd had no cramping, bleedin nothin, until past week where suddenly out of nowhere I started gushing out blood, hemorrhaging, soakin pads every 15 minutes and lightheaded. My washroom was legit a blood pool. My husband/myself were shocked, traumatised nd didn’t know what to do. But my husband cleaned me up and took me to ER, where they had to do and d&c and get the baby out nd blood transfusion was done bcz my Bp dropped to 80/60s..

i am okay now, the emotional pain overrides the physical pain I suppose. I just don’t know what to feel, i am numb, hurt, frustrated. The dr wanted to send da fetus to histopathology to get tested, but seein him/her, i just didn’t want to leav it, so we bought nd buried :’)

The hardest part i gotta survive is working in a field of midwifery and seein newborns born everyday when i have to b strong for other beautiful women. Every women deserves to be loved and is a mom, the moment conception happens.

I hope each and every of u guys get united with ur angle back in heaven soon.

Take care and keep all of us in each of your prayers cz we all deserve it.