No one is happy but me.

I had my daughter when I was 19. After I had her I got really sick and almost died. Luckily I pulled through and have been mostly health ever since. When you are as close to death as I was though and ALL of your non-essential/non life sustaining organs shut down and your life essential organs start shutting down, you normally get told some of your body may never recover. A few years later I tried to get pregnant with my now ex. We didn't prevent for the year prior then tried for a year before seeing a fertility specialist. They ran tons of tests and told me my uterus was not able to sustain life. And my ovulation was not working correctly (I was ovulating under matured eggs instead of matured eggs and then with the meds they put me on id ovulate overly matured eggs that were not able to be ferilized)

I was told these problems were probably due to the fact that I almost died several years before and my reproductive system never recovered from it. I was heart broken. We tried all different medications. And iui. We were told the chance of ivf working were so very slim after everything else had failed (5 rounds of iui) I was tired, heart broken and it was pulling me and him apart. He really wanted children of his own and when he realized it would never happen with me he became very mean.

I left him have been homeless with my daughter ever since. I met a guy. Didn't think I could get pregnant so I wasn't being careful..

And..

🤰🏼

Baby number 2 on the way.

But not a single person ishappy. No one I excited. I've been told to get an abortion. Give it up for adoption.

But every day I wake up and im excited. There is a miracle growing inside me. I wasn't supposed to be able to have anymore children. I've already started thinking about names and who this little bean is going to be. I hate that I'm the only one who is completely over the moon about this pregnancy. I feel like I shouldn't be considering my life right now. But I can't help it. A lot can change in the next 6 months. I could have an apartment by then. I have a job its not like I live on the system. I just live in a shelter apartment with my daughter at the moment.

I look for places to live every day. I work over time to help me save for a down payment.

I feel so alone. And the only place I feel safe to express my feelings is here.