Same let down feelings each baby??

With my first I was only able to breastfeed her for 4 days (breastmilk put her into liver failure at day 4 due to a rare genetic disease) she had to go on a soy formula but I pumped for a month while genetic testing was being done and every let down I felt so anxious and nauseous and like this uncomfortable body rush almost like a restless leg syndrome thing. It went away after a few minutes but I was left feeling awful, still kinda nauseous - that mixed with just so much guilt and other feelings of not being able to feed my baby and wasting that time pumping and not being with her. Anywho- my question is-

I’m pregnant again now and I’m wondering if this is what I should expect again with my let down? Do you typically have the same reactions? Does it get better if I am lucky enough this baby is able to nurse and not have the same condition my daughter has (we have a 1 in 4 chance this baby will) I will probably pump for a week or two regardless just for the healing benefits to my body, even if this baby is unable to have the milk, and donate again but I am not looking forward to those feelings.