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Question

To sum things up: my boyfriend sucks at fingering when it comes to foreplay 😭
Everything else he knows how to do SO well 🤤 I have no problem orgasming without needing to touch myself EVERY TIME we have sex. But the fingering 😖 it just makes me cringe when it comes to that part & I can’t get him to skip that step no matter how hard I try.
He’s horrible at making sure his fingernails are cut so 80% of the time he just ends up scratching me and it’s just RUINS the mood. I can’t really focus on my part of pleasing him if I’m uncomfortable & that’s all I can think about while he’s trying to please me, ya know?? 
Am I really gonna have to keep a pair of fingernail clippers on my dresser to make sure they’re cut before each time we have sex? 🙄🙄🙄
Even when his fingernails aren’t the issue, he is just never rubbing the right spot. It literally feels like he’s just scratching at my 🐱 and then pursues to ask “does that feel good?” Expecting me to play along. I mean, what do I say? No? & then the whole mood is ruined - but even if I were to just be honest and tell him to stop, Idk how to tell him how to do it without him feeling embarrassed and getting upset. I’m not even sure I know how to explain it to him myself. 
Tell me I’m not gonna have to lay down on the bed and give him a full chapter by chapter lesson on how to finger my 🐱.. 😅 has anybody else needed to have this convo with their partner before? Help a gal out.

Answer

Maybe he could hold his hand still and you could do all the movement until he finds the rhythm

Answer

Honestly when it’s not in the heat of the moment, just have a conversation about it. Communication is so important. If he gets defensive about it then that’s his problem. He should WANT to please you right. And it can even be sexy guiding his hand to the right places. Let him know exactly how you like it. It might even take a few tries after but it’ll be worth it

Answer

Girlll you are not alone!!! Not only do I have to explain to mine about fingering,, as he hurts me too when doing that, but I've had to tell him easy or not so rough thousands of times😅😏....so I get it!!! But communication is best which we have no issue with. Im just having a rough time communicating while I'm bed bc like you mentioned making him feel bad or saying the wrong thing u know 😔

Answer

I agree with the others. When he starts just reach down and take his hand move it to where/how you want it. Or just start touching yourself while he is doing it. He will feel to see what you are doing. Then take his hand show him. 
As you are showing him let him know it feels good and that you are getting into. You can let go let him take over. If he starts to do something just slowly move his hand back how it was and let go again. It will take a few times he will know. 
Trust me just because they have been with other women means nothing. Others may have just let him do whatever never said anything or done anything but lay there. He may be shy to do more than what he is if he isn't sure what you are into. I was with one guy who said everyone he been with just laid there didn't get involved change positions try new things nothing. I was with another that was very limited to what he done because he wasn't sure how I would feel if he did more. Once I said something it was great. I had to still show both things I liked or would like them to do or do a little different.

Answer

Yes, you say no, if he asks how, else is he supposed to know that you are not enjoying it. Any man that knows how to please a woman properly has had a woman in life that thought him how. It's not like he could practice on himself, he doesn't even know how it feels. There is nothing to be embarrassed about it's not like they get that thought in school. And for you if you want your man to touch you the way you like it then you need to let him know what you like. There is no way for him to know.

Answer

In the beginning of our relationship I sat there and let him do whatever he thought felt good🤦🏾‍♀️ I was worried about ruining the mood by speaking up but the mood was ruined without me even saying anything😅 I started grabbing his hand to show him what to do and it’s a million times better

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