I’m a mother to a 15 month old. I never really struggled with mental health issues until she was born. I’ve been self harming since she was around 4 months. When I started self harming I would do it when she was in my care when she was sleeping or something, at that point the cuts were *very* superficial and there was no risk of me going “too deep” and passing out etc. As time went on and my self harm escalated I made the decision to never self harm whilst my daughter is in my care and even if my partner is home and got her in a different room - I never do it when she is home. It’s a rule I’ve strictly stuck by for about 9 months. I’ve had to go to A&E a few times and I felt judged at the fact I’m a mother who self harms and has self destructive behaviour. I’m constantly having the clarify that I don’t have thoughts of hurting my daughter and her safety and well-being is the most important thing to me which is why I only harm myself when I’m home alone or I take myself to a hotel. When I’m with her I’m able to force myself to function, my bond with her is constantly improving as that’s something I struggled with. I take her to the park, play with her, keep her to a schedule, make her nutritious meals etc. I often doubt my abilities as a parent but when I step back and look at what I accomplish in a day with her, as someone with severe depression, it’s actually remarkable and my mental health team have been telling me that for months. Only now I’m starting to believe it. Bottom line:

Having mental health issues doesn’t make you a bad mother. Don’t pay attention to the stigma.