Can you be with someone that doesn’t do any household chores let alone any mechanic work?

Question

Well I am with this guy that clearly wasn’t raised right because he barely can even pick up a broom unless I asked him to. He will take the trash out but sometimes he will fill it up to the top and wait for me to say some thing he also doesn’t wash dishes he doesn’t know how to change a tire or oil and he doesn’t drive. 
He said he never learned to do those things and that he will eventually learn but he is 30 years old I feel like he will never change. I had got pregnant and lost my baby and now I’m pregnant again and I won’t say that my baby is a mistake but as far as him I don’t think that we are compatible I’m a Taurus he is a Libra he also has sneaky Ways and just now starting to change after all the things that he has put me through in the last 2 1/2 years.
He has a job and works at a lumberyard and he pays my bills and gives me whatever I ask for but as far as household duties he can’t do it I don’t know if I can be with him because I need someone to have the whole package. HE CANT DRIVE & I can’t drive a man around for the rest of his life or teach him the things that need to be done when I’m unable especially because i’m pregnant. I need your opinions I don’t know what to do and I really want to raise my baby alone
Me and his AUNT also had to change the tire . he called the tire people but his aunt picked me up because he couldn’t drive and to put the tire on he didn’t even know how to use a jack I can’t picture myself marrying this Guy or being with him the rest of my life

Accepted Answer

Just because he is a man doesn’t mean he should know mechanic work if that’s the case you should keep the house clean by yourself since you’re a woman… be careful with those gender roles!
If he pays all your bills I fail to understand what you are bringing to this “table” I mean are you employed? If you aren’t then you seem like you simply just want him to do household chores and pay your bills and fix the cars while you do nothing?!?!
It’s not adding up for me.

Answer

Didn't think about these things before you started dating him? Before you got pregnant the first time? Before you got pregnant the second time?

Answer

You couldn’t change the tire either so there’s that. You’re pregnant, not bed bound.

Answer

And what do you do all day? Sit on your ass? You expect him to work, take care of your car AND clean the house? I’m sorry but you sound like the deadbeat to me here. My husband can’t change oil on a car or do most other forms of maintenance/repairs. That’s why things called mechanics exist. I’d never dump a man just because he isn’t good with cars. And if you expect him to be able to fix your car at anytime, then you should be responsible for all of the household chores since you’re enforcing traditional gender roles.

Answer

I think you’re being unnecessarily critical and, frankly, quite sexist. 
Just because he’s a man doesn’t mean he should know mechanical work or drive or anything else. And you placing so much emphasis on him not having traditionally “masculine” skills is more worrisome than your zodiac sign compatibility… there’s nothing wrong with a woman being able to do something that her partner can’t, like change a tire. Having those kinds of sexist expectations in your relationship will not bode well.
Discussions about household maintenance and responsibilities should have happened before or at time of moving in together in the first place. But you can and should continue communicating your feelings and expectations while being open to listening to his as well. If you need more help around the house, communicate that. Ask him what you can do to help him get in that habit, ask him what’s bothering him about your relationship so that you can put in effort to improve as well. That way it’s not “nagging” him about doing chores, but it’s an actual back and forth discussion where both sides are heard and validated.

Answer

i clean up after myself, our daughter, and him when he’s tired from work, but regardless of whether you’re a stay at home wife/mom it’s not your responsibility to clean up after a grown man, but that’s just my opinion. 
my boyfriend works and i stay at home with the little ones, but he still cleans up after himself because we’re partners, i’m not his mother. i wouldn’t expect him clean up after me, regardless of who was the one going to work vs staying home. so if it’s our daughter or me making the mess i would not expect him to clean up, but yes i expect a grown man to clean up his messes.

Answer

Do you work?  If not the home should be your job. 
Im on the front that if he pays your bills and gives you a home to live in, least you could do is clean up. 
I have 3 kids and I clean cook and take care of the kods, but im lucky, I dont have to leave. 
Sorry if this irks you but its just my opinion. 
As for oil and tire changes. Unfortunately, some people aren't mechanically inclined or even want to learn. Hell just have to pay someone to do it. Its as my husbands dad says about him learning electrical work, you either will learn or youll have to pay someone. My husband doesn't like it, nor trust it so he'd rather pay for it if his dad won't help, which is dad does. 
Anyways, if you dont like it, leave but I wanted to give my two cents.

Answer

If my SO is the one working and paying the bills then I don't see a problem with doing the homework, even when pregnant. Also I can change my own tires and do other things like changing bulbs and similar if needed. As for the driving I would just encourage him to learn it before the baby arrives.

Answer

Do you work?? Just curious. My relationship is somewhat old fashioned. He works and i take care of babies home food etc. He does the outside. Mowing lawn. Garden. I cringe when i think of him doing dishes or laundry. Im not saying he doesnt do those things but he knows i have a routine. As far as mechanical my husband is not mechanically inclined. He does know how to change a tire and basics. We take our cars for oil change bc they do free tire rotation with the oil change. Men are wired different then us women so a honey do list or something similar would probably help a lot. Or just be super straightforward. Tell him hey ya know i need your help more on your days off. Can u do...... It might help. I hope you both work out. My husband did not have a mother or father. He was in 24 different foster homes. Noone took the time to teach him basic care or even love. He is 100% a different person. Patience and love girl. Thats what i did. Not saying u need to do what i did. Just maybe not be so quick to out a man down bc of comparing him to other men. Idk. Hope some of what i said helps.

Answer

The least you could do is drive him around considering you don’t appreciate anything he does. 😂

Can you be with someone that doesn’t do any household chores let alone any mechanic work?

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