Giving and receiving gifts

A friend once told me and a few of our friends he thinks gifts are "stupid". He said that as an adult, if he needs or wants something, he can buy it himself, and receiving things he neither needs nor wants is a waste of everyone's time and money. I could tell some of our friends were miffed (he had just had a baby and a few of us sent some small gifts), but I think I might feel the same as he does. I live in a tiny apt with my husband and a toddler, so anything new feels like a huge burden, and I'm ashamed to admit I have had to return my fair share of well-intentioned gifts.

As far as giving gifts, when I have time, I do find pleasure in trying to think of what someone might like. But I usually don't have time, so it ends up being just a stressful situation

I know a lot of my family members might consider giving and receiving gifts their "love language", and I want to respect that. But I also really think that, at least in American culture, gift-giving has gotten out of hand and has been overtaken by consumerism, so at the end of the day it feels wasteful. There of course are experience gifts, like movie tickets and cooking classes, but those also don't always line up with the receiver's schedule and can often go to waste.

What are your thoughts? Some questions to consider:

- Do you enjoy receiving and/or giving gifts?

- Do you think there's a way to avoid gift giving being a wasteful tradition?

- What is the best gift you ever received? Gave? Worst?

- Is there anyway to tactfully request to skip gifts, particularly around the holiday season?

- Is it possible that no adult enjoys gifts, but everyone keeps it going because it's what's expected?