I have most always been the more aggressive one who initiates except for before we were together and early on in dating. I get really insecure because of me always initiating, and I feel sad/frustrated (not attractive) when he doesn't want to as often. (I know this is not true, but I can't help initially having those feelings) When we were just "dating" years ago, he was aggressive and adventurous, and foreplay was long. I most usually finished way before him.

It's been probably a year (maybe longer) since I've finished now. I've had some "maybe orgasms" like those small ones that I'm not even sure.

I still initiate sex constantly half because I just love the connection and want to please HIM, and half because I am hoping maybe it will be the time I finish.

But when I initiate, I'm mentally wanting to have sex but am physically dry... So by the time I've gotten him to where he's in the mood, he just goes for it. (Minimal foreplay- 2 minutes max).

The whole thing is so frustrating, but I don't want him to feel bad or hurt his ego by trying to talk it all out. He already is self conscious about not lasting long and not being able to control when he finishes even though I always say "it's okay. It feels good to me even f I don't finish, and I just love to be intimate with you no matter how long, and enjoy making you feel good."

But honestly afterwards I'm so frustrated I could cry. Not mad at him necessarily just really sexually frustrated.