Depression.

Just came home abs starting randomly crying. Sometimes I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing in my life. I looks round and feel like everyone has together and I just don’t. I feel like I’m not smart enough or good enough or I just didn’t do enough. I’m 24 I see people driving and having cars, working and graduating and making money, having lots of friends. And I have to say I have never felt more alone. I went to the dmv this week to take the knowledge test and failed such an easy test that everyone seems to pass. I walked out upset with myself. I graduated college and since I graduated in the pandemic I have not found a job because everyone requires experience. I decided to get into real estate took the 75 hours and was committed to waking up everyday 8:30 to 2pm to attend class. Everything was crammed in 16 days. The whole book. I passed the school exam by a 71 I just made it. Barley ever so slightly. Went to schedule my state exam and had to reschedule instead in here crying on how I’m not ready to take it so soon. I feel unmotivated and feel like I haven’t been trying as hard to study as I did for the school test. I stayed up till 4 am everyday for school to pass the school test and I just passed out. I didn’t even get a 80. Why am I so dumb. I feel like I look around and everyone is smarter than me. I went to interview a broker today and first thing they tell me is they will get my looks to best fit their company. I just had my hair curly and dressed very professional. It made me feel a little worthless because it sounded like I needed to change something about myself? I don’t know if that’s typical in real estate. But when she said they moved her hand on her face meaning something in my face had to change. I ended up rescheduling my exam test rather than taking it the 20th. I feel unready. I feel overwhelmed and depressed. This week has been an emotional rollercoaster for me and ontop of that I have lost most of my friends. I have no one to talk too and the ones I do I don’t want to bother anyone. How do I stay motivated and look at the brighter side of things when I feel absolutely worthless.