Okay so this is kind of embarrassing. But you know when you work out after a long time, your body is really sore? So I remember a long time ago that happened and I had to use the restroom. So I go and as I was sitting on the toilet, my thighs were so sore, literally any movement hurt. So as I was sitting on the toilet my thighs hurt so bad that I kind of sat too quick and idk if my butt cheeks were spread out but I felt a huge pain on my butthole. Like it ripped.

And for days after, Everytime I wiped it burned so much. Even had a little blood. I looked it up and it said that it was like ruptured but it would heal on its own. And well I never told anyone cause that's kinda embarrassing.

Anyways so I thought it was healing but idk, when I shower I touch myself there to clean it yk. And well it always felt kind of open regardless.

The pain eventually stopped and so did the bleeding (it wasn't a lot of bleeding).

And I remember my ex even made a comment after we had sex that my butthole was too big (this was so embarrassing).

But I remember another time, months later the same thing happened. I wasn't sore but I guess I sat down too quickly and it hurt again like it had opened. (That skin between your vagina and butthole, but the butthole side was riped open I think).

And well now the pain is gone but it's like Everytime I shit, especially if it's a big one, I had very minimal bleeding and the smallest amount of burning where the rip happened.

I haven't looked but it's like that rim layer of my butthole is stretched out. I thought it would heal itself but now I'm self conscious about it 😭 this is not a troll post, I'm genuinely concerned. Any advice?

(Also due to me wanting to stay anonymous I will reply to comments as an edit)