It's been 3 weeks since my d&c... and it's not getting easier. Each day is harder and harder to get through.

Wednesday night I had a dream I had a newborn girl. We spent the sunny afternoon on a blanket under the shade of a tree. Leaving that dream was like leaving heaven and waking up in hell.

All I've wanted to do is cry.

It's like the dream was a sucker punch and I can't catch my breath.

I had a nervous breakdown in Olive Garden tonight.

I feel like when they took out my baby they took with it my ability to be happy.