So my boyfriend passed away on September 8th. We were together for about 4 months. While we were together he and I were inseparable when we were together and when we weren’t together and I was back in my state (he lived in Missouri and I lived in Colorado) we were always messaging on Snapchat or on a video call together. I ended up moving to Missouri earlier this month and it’s just been a hard time being around all of the memories where we were together. I’m trying to move forward and not let my negative thoughts from my anxiety and depression overwhelm me where I can’t move forward or I should feel guilty for trying to keep existing without him. I feel guilty about his passing because on the day of his accident he was on his motorcycle bringing me to the airport because I told him I really wanted to ride a bike for the first time. He made sure of it and made sure that everything on his bike was safe the night before just so he knew he could keep me safe. I know the accident was not his fault and everything on that matter but I still have the guilt feeling because he could’ve been in his truck and this all might have not happened.

I want to start moving forward and I have been considering on dating again but not yet. It’s definitely something in the near future I’m considering but not at this exact moment. I deleted all of my social medias because of how difficult it has been receiving messages from people who knew him and telling me “you’ll be fine, you’ll move forward.” I know they’re saying it with good reason but it’s really not something I needed or wanted to hear. Should I feel guilty for already considering on moving on? Should I even try to move on yet? I don’t know what is right or what is wrong and I’m just taking this all one day at a time.