My kid hates me

A big thing I’ve struggled with my whole life is feeling like I’m wanted and belong. I have one good friend and my husband of course. But I’ve felt pretty lonely, I have a daughter and she’s only 11 months old and I know she’s a baby but she hates me. Shes not attached to me at all which I feel like is because she was born prematurely. I didn’t get to hold her for over a week and she’s just never been attached to me. I try to be the best mommy I can be, I’m a stay at home mom, and I feel like I’m just a care taker to her. Yesterday I took her to the aquarium because I try to take her to do something fun once a week and I put her in my carrier and she pushed her hand against my chest the whole time like I was the worst. And tonight she won’t sleep and nothing I do helps. I always thought a mother’s cuddle would comfort but it’s like I’m the worst. It’s really hard for me because my mom died when I was baby so I grew up with no mom. I’ve wanted to be a mom my whole life and I want to be the best but I feel so stupid that I’m balling daily because I feel like my kid would rather have any other mom in the world. Sorry just needed to rant and cry and it’s just hard.